Alright, settle back into that worn spot on the couch, maybe crack open a Tab or a Jolt Cola if you can still find one. Tonight on VHS Heaven, we’re rewinding to 1990 and popping in a tape that practically flew off rental shelves: Steven Seagal’s sophomore bone-cruncher, Hard to Kill. If Above the Law (1988) introduced us to the ponytail-sporting Aikido master, this one cemented him as a bankable action hero, delivering exactly the kind of straightforward, no-nonsense beatdowns audiences were craving.
### Waking Up is Hard to Do (Especially After 7 Years)
Remember the premise? It’s pure, uncut 90s revenge fuel. LAPD Detective Mason Storm (Seagal) stumbles onto serious political corruption involving smarmy wannabe Senator Vernon Trent (William Sadler, perfectly embodying slimy ambition). Before you can say "internal affairs," Storm's family is attacked, he's left for dead, and he slips into a coma. The twist? He wasn't quite dead enough. Seven years later, he wakes up in a hospital, a man out of time with a beard that screams "I've been unconscious since 1983" and one thing on his mind: payback. It’s a setup so perfectly pulpy, you can almost smell the cheap paper of the novelization it probably deserved.
The film kicks off with a bang, establishing the stakes quickly and brutally. Director Bruce Malmuth, who also gave us the gritty Stallone/Hauer team-up Nighthawks (1981), knew how to stage immediate, visceral violence. The initial home invasion sequence is nasty and effective, setting a grim tone that justifies Storm’s later rampage. Interestingly, the film's working title was Seven Year Storm, which feels a bit more poetic, but Hard to Kill definitely has that direct, punchy quality that summed up the Seagal brand.
### The Healing Power of Aikido and questionable Montages
A huge chunk of the film revolves around Storm’s recovery, aided by nurse Andy Stewart, played by Kelly LeBrock. Now, let's be honest, the chemistry here is... interesting. Seagal and LeBrock were married at the time, which adds a layer of real-life context to their on-screen dynamic. LeBrock, who exploded onto the scene with The Woman in Red (1984) and the iconic Weird Science (1985), plays against her usual glamorous type here, portraying a dedicated caregiver caught up in Storm's dangerous world.
Their secluded recovery sequence features one of the most gloriously 90s training montages ever committed to film. We get acupuncture, herbal remedies, martial arts practice (because of course), and Seagal regaining his mojo while sporting some truly memorable loungewear. It’s earnest, slightly ridiculous, and utterly charming in its datedness. You have to admire the film's commitment to showing the process of getting back into fighting shape, even if it involves meditating near a picturesque waterfall.
### That Sweet Sound of Snapping Wrists
But let's talk action, because that's why you rented this tape back in the day, right? Seagal's signature Aikido style was still relatively fresh on screen. Unlike the high kicks of Van Damme or the bulging muscles of Schwarzenegger and Stallone, Seagal offered something different: close-quarters combat focused on joint locks, throws, and brutally efficient strikes. The fight choreography feels grounded and impactful. Remember how real those bone breaks sounded echoing from your CRT TV speakers?
The practical effects are where Hard to Kill truly shines in retrospect. The hospital escape is a highlight – real stunt performers, tangible danger, and a sense of chaos that feels miles away from today's slick, CG-heavy sequences. The car chases have weight; the shootouts feature satisfyingly messy squib hits that spray theatrical blood with abandon. Was that convenience store shootout sequence not a masterclass in collateral damage for its time? There's a raw, unpolished energy to the action that defined this era. They weren't just simulating danger; they were often putting performers right in the thick of it, and you could feel that tension bleed through the screen. Made on a budget of around $11.5 million, its nearly $60 million worldwide gross proved Warner Bros. had backed a winner, tapping directly into the audience's appetite for this kind of hard-hitting action.
### The Bad Guy You Love to Hate
No revenge flick works without a solid villain, and William Sadler delivers. His Senator Trent is pure, unadulterated scum – arrogant, power-hungry, and utterly ruthless. Sadler just nails that entitled slimeball persona, making him someone you genuinely can't wait to see get his comeuppance. He became a fantastic character actor often playing villains around this time, memorable in films like Die Hard 2 (also 1990) and Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey (1991). The supporting cast of thugs are suitably menacing, providing ample fodder for Storm's particular brand of justice.
Critics at the time? Mostly unimpressed, citing the thin plot and Seagal's stoic (some might say wooden) performance. But audiences didn't care. Hard to Kill delivered exactly what it promised: a tough hero, a hissable villain, and plenty of satisfying action. It solidified the Seagal formula: the mysterious past, the martial arts mastery, the quiet intensity punctuated by sudden bursts of violence, and, of course, those killer one-liners. Who could forget the immortal "I'm gonna take you to the bank, Senator Trent. To the blood bank"? Pure cheesy gold.
***
VHS Heaven Rating: 7/10
Justification: While the plot is tissue-thin, the dialogue occasionally laughable, and Seagal's acting range limited, Hard to Kill scores high on pure, unadulterated 90s action satisfaction. The practical stunts and fights deliver a visceral punch, William Sadler is a great villain, and it perfectly encapsulates the appeal of early Seagal. It knows exactly what it is and delivers with brutal efficiency.
Final Rewind: Forget nuance; this is blunt-force cinematic trauma served straight up. Hard to Kill is a glorious time capsule of early 90s action filmmaking – raw, physical, and utterly convinced of its own coolness. It might creak a bit today, but pop it in, and you'll still feel the satisfying crunch of vengeance served cold... or rather, after a seven-year nap.