Alright, fellow tape-heads, settle in. Remember that feeling? Scanning the horror aisle at Blockbuster, maybe on a Friday night, the fluorescent lights buzzing overhead. You’d seen the first two Critters – maybe even rented them multiple times – and then you spotted it: Critters 3. The cover art looked a bit… different. Less dusty farmland, more grimy cityscape. Curiosity piqued, you grabbed that chunky plastic clamshell, wondering if the magic (and the mayhem) could possibly translate to the big city. Little did we know we were also grabbing a peculiar piece of future Hollywood history.
### Urban Furball Invasion
Instead of the familiar fields of Grover's Bend, Critters 3 (1991) boldly, or perhaps budget-consciously, relocates the action to a run-down Los Angeles apartment building. The setup is classic sequel fodder: just as the Brown family thinks they've escaped the Crite menace, some leftover eggs hitch a ride back to civilization under their camper. Soon, the toothy, Tribble-like terrors are hatching and wreaking havoc on the unsuspecting tenants of a crumbling tenement block, overseen by a truly sleazy landlord (played with gusto by John Calvin).
Directed by Kristine Peterson, who cut her teeth on Roger Corman productions and helmed other direct-to-video staples like Body Chemistry (1990), the film tries to recapture the blend of horror and comedy that made the original Critters (1986) such a fun ride. The shift to an urban setting, however, inevitably changes the dynamic. Gone is the isolated farmhouse dread, replaced by the slightly more claustrophobic, but also more generic, confines of hallways, apartments, and elevator shafts. It feels smaller, tighter, and distinctly more… 90s direct-to-video.
### Puppets Take LA (on a Budget)
Let's talk about the stars: the Crites themselves. While the original creature effects were handled by the talented Chiodo Brothers (Killer Klowns from Outer Space, 1988), their direct involvement here feels diminished. You can sense the tighter budget constraints – a reported $3 million combined for filming both this and Critters 4 back-to-back, a common cost-saving measure back then. Yet, there's still that undeniable charm of practical effects. Remember watching these on a slightly fuzzy CRT, the imperfect movements making them feel oddly more real?
The puppetry and animatronics, while perhaps less refined than in the first two outings, deliver the goods. The Crites roll, they bounce, they snarl, and they form that iconic, Jaws-on-legs giant ball of teeth. Watching them scurry through vents or pop out of toilets has that tactile, physical quality that modern CGI often lacks. Sure, maybe you can glimpse a wire or see the mechanics working overtime, but wasn't that part of the fun? It felt crafted, handmade, a tangible threat built from latex and fur, not pixels. Those practical explosions and slime effects hit differently back then, didn't they?
### Spot the Future Superstar
The human cast is largely populated by serviceable B-movie archetypes – the resourceful kids (Aimee Brooks as Annie, the returning protagonist, and Christian Cousins as her brother Johnny), the grumpy superintendent, the aforementioned sleazeball landlord. But eagle-eyed viewers, even back in '91, might have noticed a familiar face, albeit a very young one. Playing the landlord's reluctant stepson, Josh, is none other than Leonardo DiCaprio in his feature film debut!
It's almost surreal seeing the future titan of cinema, years before Titanic or The Wolf of Wall Street, dodging low-budget alien hedgehogs in a cheap apartment set. Retro Fun Fact: Apparently, DiCaprio later described Critters 3 as possibly "one of the worst films of all time," but conceded he had fun making it. Finding out that this DTV creature feature was shot partly on soundstages potentially recycling sets from other New Line Cinema productions (a common practice) just adds to the B-movie charm surrounding his humble beginnings. It’s a fantastic bit of trivia that makes revisiting Critters 3 almost worthwhile just for the "before they were stars" factor.
### Direct-to-Video Destiny
Critters 3 wasn't exactly lighting up the box office – it was primarily a straight-to-video affair, destined for weekend rentals and late-night cable slots. It lacks the sharp writing and tonal balance of the original, leaning more into silliness and predictable horror tropes. The plot feels stretched thin, essentially becoming a series of Crite attack vignettes within the building. The bounty hunters, Ug and Lee, feel sidelined and almost unnecessary this time around.
Still, there’s an undeniable energy to it, a relic of a time when franchises could keep churning out sequels directly for the home video market, banking on name recognition and the promise of creature carnage. I distinctly remember the slightly worn feel of the tape I rented, the tracking occasionally going wonky during a Crite attack, adding an unintended layer of visual chaos. It wasn't high art, but it was fun in that specific way only a 90s horror sequel could be.
Final Rating: 5/10
Justification: Critters 3 gets points for keeping the practical Crite dream alive, the sheer novelty of Leonardo DiCaprio's debut, and delivering some dumb fun within its limited means. However, the noticeable budget drop, weaker script, less effective setting, and overall feeling of franchise fatigue prevent it from reaching the heights of the first (or even second) film. It’s a definite step down, but not entirely without its goofy, nostalgic charms.
Final Comment: It may not be the crown jewel of the Crite saga, but Critters 3 is a fascinating time capsule – a reminder that sometimes, the most unexpected treasures (like a future Oscar winner battling fuzzballs) could be found lurking in the direct-to-video depths of your local rental store. Pop it in for the trivia, stay for the puppets.